Haribo carnal encounters

25 Aug

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Rarely does a letter in a newspaper make me laugh like this, it all about a lemon and lime getting it ooooooooon…

lemonlimesex-48

This letter – printed in the Daily Mail today – is so extreme / ridiculous I think someone may (OK simply MUST) be taking the piss – or it is some super secret super clever guerrilla campaign from Haribo. Either that or there are some very strange people in the World… It’s hardly the Karma Sutra is it? I see no sign of an apple deep throating a banana here – this person is nuts.

The letter:

My sweet wrapper leaves a sour taste

The other day, while doing our weekly shop, I bought for my two children, Benjamin & Ofelia, a packet pf Haribo Maoam lemon-and-lime confectionery. It was only after I was leaving the check-out that I noticed the appalling illustration on the packaging.

This consists of a lemon and a lime locked in what appears to be a carnal encounter. The lime, who I assume to be the gentleman in this coupling, has a particularly lurid and distasteful expression on his face. I demanded to see the shop manager and during a heated exchange my wife became quite distressed and had to sit down in the car park. I was told to register my complaint with the manufacturer.

I’m glad I spotted this before my young children, who are both very sensitive. My wife and I have always tried to protect their innocence – and to think all our years of careful parenting could have been wrecked by a sweet rapper makes me livid.

I received a reply from the company saying that the wrapper design had been introduced in Germany in 2002 with a view to making the fruit figures ‘more modern and lively’ to ‘better appeal to the consumer’.

It said: ‘At no point was it intended to create sexual images’ It has been shown to a number of children and adults of different age groups, none of whom has made any comments referring to sexual content. I consider this reply to be less than satisfactory. As a member of our local church, I’m now urging members of our flock to bycott Haribo products until this illustration is removed.

Simon Simpkins
Pontefract, West Yorks

xx

** UPDATE **

The Sun newspaper have now picked up on this story (whoa there it took you a good three days) – see my comment on the sun here, and their coverage here.

**UPDATE 2** (source)

Students at a Catholic school complained about new Haribo sweet wrappers which they claim portray fruit having sex.

Graduates from St Blasien Jesuit College, near Freiburg, were complaining about the new wrappers for Haribo’s Moam sweets.

In a letter to the firm, they wrote: “We are shocked at the shameless presentation of sexual practices on the wrapping, which includes not only sexual intercourse but also fellatio and cunnilingus.”

The letter added: “It’s irresponsible, to expose children to such pornographic representations.”

The sweets wrapped in bright yellow, red and green colours show lemons, limes, strawberries, cherries and oranges romping with each other.

The students were especially opposed to the lemon flavoured chews, which “undoubtedly show a green figure having sex with a lemon”.

“The lemon, which from the drawing looks female, is obviously enjoying it with the greatest of pleasure.”

Haribo bosses admit the new packaging is “very racy”, but said in tests no complaints had been raised.

Spokesman Marco Alfter said: “The new wrapping is certainly fruitier than the old. But we have not had any other complaints. In fact until now the feedback has all been positive.”

30 Responses to “Haribo carnal encounters”

  1. Watoo August 25, 2009 at 2:43 pm #

    Personally I’m outraged. Someone needs to ban this sick filth before this country goes down the pan. First 2 World Wars now THIS?! It makes me sick into my tartiflettes.

  2. jr August 25, 2009 at 2:43 pm #

    lol, what a loser

  3. Johanna August 25, 2009 at 3:37 pm #

    Ha, I remember that there was some discussion about that here in Germany after the re-design… I’m glad they kept the new design, seriously!
    And now you got me hungry for Maoam! ;)

  4. Cakehead Loves Evil August 25, 2009 at 7:09 pm #

    Oh to be a fly on the wall when (if real) the supermarket row was going on!

  5. 90percenttrue August 25, 2009 at 8:08 pm #

    My mother reads the daily mail and I am generally appalled by the racist, narrow minded an idiotic content.

    This has to be genuine. No doubt.

  6. simpkin eh August 25, 2009 at 8:12 pm #

    hmm, of simpkin sweets perhaps? propaganda against haribo in the credit munch…….

  7. CF August 25, 2009 at 8:14 pm #

    It takes a sick person to percieve that than anything other than a harmless wrapper.

    To go looking….I mean….for frig sake!
    MWAGH Daily Mail really needs how to infuriate people!

  8. kablaamee August 25, 2009 at 9:26 pm #

    “I’m glad I spotted this before my young children, who are both very sensitive.” What age would these children be, being so sensitive yet still understand the concept of a sexual image portrayed be sexless fruit??
    “and to think all our years of careful parenting could have been wrecked by a sweet rapper makes me livid” If all it would take is a generic image like that to destroy years of parenting, you’re doing it wrong.

  9. Kelly August 25, 2009 at 9:37 pm #

    Y’kinda have to sit back and think that the guy must have a filthy mind. I mean, who else immediatly thinks “ZOHMAHGOTH,THELEMONANDLIMEAREGETTIN’ITOOOOON!!!” when they see this wrapper? I’m one of the filthiest minded people I know, and I’ve never thought the wrapper to be “disgusting”

    Idiots -_-

  10. Zsk August 25, 2009 at 11:14 pm #

    Thank you so much for posting that – we spent all day at work laughing about it. I was gutted that the Mail doesn’t put its letters online (and I never thought I’d write anything like that!)

    right – off to check on the fruit bowl. Can’t leave those filthy citruses on their own for five seconds…

  11. JoB August 26, 2009 at 12:25 am #

    I know. Pure filth! I had long believed that those shameless lemons and limes were the most perverted of all the fruits and this only goes to prove it! Haribo now just risks being complicit in the unwrapping of the darkest deepest secrets of the outrageously deviant citrus family.

    Family values??!! Well just sit me down in the nearest car park and force me to suck on a grapefruit – for they are the forgotten fruit, and will save the sweet eating universe as we know it!

    Stand up for virgin sweets!

  12. Scott Pack August 26, 2009 at 8:08 am #

    A genuine Mail reader would never put their children’s names in a letter for fear of attracting paedophiles!

    And that lemon and lime are definitely at it.

    I suspect the letter writer is secretly more concerned by the inter-racial coupling.

  13. Ishmael August 26, 2009 at 8:50 am #

    Didn’t I read in the Daily Mail somewhere that scientists were aiming to produce hybrid Lemon-Lime embryos, which would no doubt try to destroy the world by unleashing a wave of hoodie wearing paedophiles from the basement of the European Parliament? Clearly the fruits have outsmarted the boffins on this one.

  14. ULM August 26, 2009 at 10:33 am #

    Comment denied as poster is clearly a tosser:

    [if you want to expressing your views without wishing people dead and wanking then feel free to submit another comment]

  15. Jensen Intercepter August 26, 2009 at 10:40 am #

    Not only is it a disgusting sexual image ** ******* ****, it also seems to be inter-racial. I already boycott Scotland, Israel, France and George Forman products. I shall now also boycott Haribo.

  16. ARPD August 26, 2009 at 10:41 am #

    Ruddy sausage-munchers and their reliable cars and effective love-making techniques.

    My grandad didn’t hide for six years for this sort of thing.

  17. Julie August 26, 2009 at 11:08 am #

    That’s the funniest thing I’ve read for some time! Anywhere other than the daily mail I’d say marketing ploy, but in that paper, it may well be genuine.

  18. Despina Symeou August 26, 2009 at 12:24 pm #

    tThis says more about the parents than the wrapper

  19. Mayor West August 26, 2009 at 1:18 pm #

    Clearly lemons cant have sex. I doubt the validity of this.

    *Awaits clinical trial*

  20. Phil August 26, 2009 at 5:53 pm #

    If the parents are gormless enough to name their poor kids Benjamin and Ofelia, then are we surprised they get upset by two bits of fruit?

    Don’t tell ‘em about what bees upto for gawds sake. There would be outrage.

  21. Cakehead Loves Evil August 27, 2009 at 12:07 pm #

    Most certainly a total and utter fake – told you so…

  22. Woman on a Raft (Ms) August 27, 2009 at 1:24 pm #

    When Haribo were first warned about this it was 2004 , as recalled on the Justinland blog.

    http://justinland.typepad.com/justinland/2004/09/fruity_snacks_1.html

    But Haribo wouldn’t listen. Since then we’ve had the collapse of the world banking system and property values in the UK have plunged.

    Yes, well, perhaps they’ll change their wrappers now, before we all die of swineflu.

  23. Cakehead Loves Evil August 27, 2009 at 2:01 pm #

    Martin in Cow says: Haribo’s marketing department appears to be lying low on this one, with calls going to voice mail and the company’s doughty receptionist telling us they are all a meeting. What I totally failed to check was that Haribo is also based in Pontefract.

  24. Woman on a Raft (Ms) August 27, 2009 at 2:37 pm #

    Haribo is based in Pontefract but the only chewy sweets which are allowed to be made in Pontefract are the rubbery pucks known as Pontefract Cakes.

    Quick! Alert the Mail – Ishamel (above) was right – Haribo is genetically modified liquorice.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pontefract_cake

    Mark my words – if we don’t stop this, there will be armies of Bertie Bassett liquorice stormtroopers coming for our children. It will be like Star Wars meets Willie Wonka.

    Why o why don’t the newspapers, like the normally reliable Mail, take any notice of these threats to our way of life?

  25. Richie August 27, 2009 at 3:28 pm #

    I love the very passive dig in Haribo’s response:

    “It has been shown to a number of children and adults of different age groups, none of whom has made any comments referring to sexual content.”

    So what the hell is wrong with you, you massive pervert?

  26. Gareth August 30, 2009 at 6:06 am #

    Is the Lemon the girl or the Lime? The may both be Girls ! or Boys for that matter! Bring it on more Citric Porn please, but lets keep it straight!

  27. Ad_Lib September 17, 2009 at 2:47 pm #

    Hillarious. HARIBO is no stranger to odd-looking packaging and odd-sounding product names. Has anyone sampled their CREAMY DREAMS range? ;)
    http://dazbert.co.uk/sites/rudefood/index.php?show=Creamy%20Dreams

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

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